When Self-Help Becomes A Negative Thing

When Self-Help Becomes a Negative Thing

The right self-help book or course can be a tremendously powerful tool. I use them a lot.

I have seen it transform people’s lives: I’ve seen people go from being nervous, shy and unconfident and become more naturally attractive, confident and interesting.

But I would also argue that things have been taken a little too far.

There is so much self-help literature out there now and so much advice on how we can become better versions of who we are.

But is it all constructive?

Why Self-Help Can be Damaging

While I’ve seen people who have been positively influenced by self-help books, I’ve also seen people who have been damaged by them.

One of the most common ways this can happen, is when self-help becomes a delay tactic. In other words, people can use self-help as a means to delay the work they should be doing to improve themselves.

In other words: people will buy a book and then will instantly feel as though they are making good progress.

Toward being a better version of themselves.

They’ve made the effort by buying the book after all: so they can pat themselves on the back and keep on reading.

And then they buy the next book.

Then the next book.

They feel great about themselves except they haven’t actually changed anything.

Self-help is destructive when it ends up being a delay tactic.

If you are only using it in theory and never in practice, then it is hindering rather than helping your progress.

Knowing Who to Trust

The other issue is that self-help can be very mixed depending on where you get it from.

The problem with the internet is that anyone can contribute and there are lots of incentive to do.

The problem then is you can end up following advice that is based on zero evidence.   It may also have been written by someone in no position to be giving that advice.

It’s common knowledge for example that visualizing your goals can help you to get what you want from life. But did you know that this only works if you visualize them in the correct way? Some studies suggest that having a goal is much less important that having a plan.

So question what you read, act on it and then decide what works for you personally.

Please leave a comment below if you enjoyed todays post, When Self-Help Becomes A Negative Thing.

 

Business/Life Coach, Entrepreneur and Author 

Helping Women in Business Climb The Ladder To Their Dreams

Get in touch – Email me at Lynda@lyndakennyonline.com

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